Queer Eye for the Stargate Guy
by SaraC

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E-MAIL: silk1023@aol.com
STATUS: Complete
RATING: PG
SEASON: 7
SPOILERS: Through Season 7
CATEGORY: D/J, humor, Crossover
SUMMARY: Daniel gets a makeover from the Fab Five
DISCLAIMER: I own neither the SG-1 nor the Queer Eye guys, I’m just borrowing them for some good old fashioned fun!
AUTHOR'S NOTES: This story is completely the result of my friends Sheryl and Marty who got me to watch an episode of Queer Eye for the Straight Guy and all we could do was comment on what would happen if the Fab Five got ahold of Daniel and had to deal with the Stargate team. So, here is the result, complete with some good old fashioned Dan/Jan romance thrown in for fun! Hopefully you enjoy!

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“Teal’c, do you think I’m boring?”

The tall Jaffa raised an eyebrow at the man seated across from him in the candlelit circle.

“I had believed your presence tonight was for the purpose of kel’no’reem, DanielJackson. Is there something else you wish to discuss?”

Daniel pushed his glasses up the bridge of his nose and shrugged sheepishly. Teal’c was somewhat right. He had hoped that the soothing routine of kel’no’reem might ease the annoyance he’d been feeling since this afternoon.

“Actually, I overheard several of the nurses in the infirmary talking today-”

“Were you intending to hear them DanielJackson?”

Daniel looked chagrined for a moment. “Um, no, but I was waiting to see Janet about my allergy medicine and I couldn’t help but hear them talking about me.”

The Jaffa’s eyebrows rose again. “And what they spoke of, it disturbed you?”

Daniel sighed and nodded. He felt a little uncomfortable talking to Teal’c about this, but the Jaffa was really his only option. Jack would make some sarcastic remark or laugh, and well, Sam was out simply because she was a woman. Janet, well, considering how he felt about her, the last thing he wanted to discuss with her was how he appeared to people.

“Do you intend to tell me what was said DanielJackson?”

Daniel took a deep breath before nodding. “They, um, well, they were talking about how, um, well, cute I was,” he stopped for a moment at the raised eyebrows again, but plowed on before he lost his nerve. “But then they said that I was cute but boring and rather geekish,” he winced at the word, hating the sound of it.

“I have heard this term, ‘geek,’ used before but I am unclear as to what it means.”

Daniel sighed, running a hand through his hair. “Well, it sort of means someone who isn’t exactly the most fashionable or popular. A ‘geek’ is usually thought of as very smart and studious person.” He stopped as the Jaffa simply looked at him, feeling a bit uncomfortable.

“Forgive me if I am missing something, DanielJackson, but this description does seem to fit you rather well. You are indeed a smart man and from what I observe daily, a studious one.” The Jaffa seemed to warm to the topic as he continued despite Daniel’s attempts to interrupt.

“You seem to be the favored one of SG-1 whenever we are in the infirmary and I have noted several of the nurses looking at you with interest over during mission debriefs. This, I have also noted, greatly annoys O’Neill.”

Daniel looked at the Jaffa in surprise. He hadn’t thought his friends were aware of the nurses stares. He preferred to ignore them, concentrating on the only woman he really wanted staring at him. It didn’t help that she usually was looking at him with a doctor’s eye.

“You seem surprised by this, DanielJackson.”

Daniel nodded, swallowing before trying again. “Well, they might look at me, Teal’c, but they don’t think I have much style or fashion. I mean, Jack has hassled me about cleaning out the ‘junk’ in my apartment and Sam is always telling me to wear my hair one way or another. Even Janet has joked about my tendency to destroy any nice outfits I have, although it’s usually because of a Gou’ald plot or some kind of alien has taken over my body, or because I ascended and most of my dressier clothing was given to Goodwill.”

He stopped as he felt the intense stare the Jaffa was giving him. Swallowing, he waited for a reply, wondering again why he had decided to tell all this to an alien from another planet. Not the exact first choice for a confidant on style.

“Do you desire to change yourself, DanielJackson? Perform what I believe is called a do over?”

“Make over, Teal’c, I think you meant make over,” he replied with a sigh, leaning back on his hands as he gave the Jaffa a helpless look. “I don’t know, I just know that I have to change something about my life, or at least my lifestyle, especially if I want Janet to see me-”

He stopped suddenly, aware he had almost revealed his feelings for the petite doctor. His heart sank a little as the eyebrows rose again.

“You are finally ready to ask DoctorFraiser to partake of food with you someplace other than on base?”

Daniel sputtered, wondering if he had really been that obvious. “If you mean ask Janet on a date, well, I, um, I suppose. But you can’t say anything to her, promise me Teal’c.” The words were a bit desperate but he couldn’t help it. The last thing he needed was for Teal’c to be the one to tell Janet that he was interested in her.

The Jaffa remained silent for a moment, then nodded his head slightly. “I will keep your confidence, DanielJackson, and perhaps I might offer a suggestion that would help you with your problem?”

For the first time that night, Daniel felt a smidgeon of hope. Of course, the fact that it was, again, an alien from another planet offering him this information, might be a factor to consider. Then again, what did he have to loose?

“Go ahead, Teal’c. It’s worth a shot.”

“I have heard of a television show in which five extremely happy men help other men with their clothing and furniture accessories.”

Daniel raised an eyebrow. “Extremely happy?”

“Indeed,” came the taciturn reply.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~

“We’re on our way to today’s makeover: Daniel Jackson, noted archaeologist and anthropologist based in Colorado Springs.” The words were addressed to a cameraman in the front seat of a white van, making its way through a suburban neighborhood.

“Because there’s just so many archeological and anthropological treasures to discover in the middle of a major city.” A small, tan skinned man made a waving motion to indicate the scenery around him.

“But get this, he works for the government and he’s single.” A third man shuddered and made a cringing motion. “You know how drab government decorating can be. Oh, I can only imagine the color we’re going to need to brighten up his apartment.”

“Hey, I’m sure he’ll be glad to get away from commissary food,” offered a fourth man, a tall, wiry compliment to his friends. “Plus, being a worldly archeologist, he’s no doubt quick to pick up new things which means, heaven help us, we can get through one of these without any broken glass.”

“Exactly, and have you seen a picture of Daniel?” The thin blonde man gushed as he held up a picture towards the man with the camera in the front seat. “Too delicious for words, but he really needs to accentuate those baby blues, and those arm muscles!” The five men all made various fluttering motions with their hands.

“I bet he does a lot of lifting in his job, those pectorals are to die for! Imagine what we can do with a little work on his outfits. Greens and browns are well and good for the dig site but for a night out, accessorize baby!”

“Well,” stated the smaller man, “at least he seems willing to change. After all, he called us and requested our help.”

“Either that or he was getting the typical “cute but geekish” comments from the public and decided it was time for a change.” Wry laughter greeted the comment, although the blonde was quick to reply.

“Well, we all agree there’s definite potential and what else do we do best but show him how to bring it out. Then let’s see how the women react!”

The five men continued to gush to each other, and the cameraman in the front seat as they pulled up to Daniel’s apartment. With a flurry of activity, the men stepped from the car and stared up at the front of the building before them.

“Well, it’s not exactly the prettiest building. Then again, as they say, you can’t judge a book by its cover.”

The blonde man, obviously taking the lead, whirled back around with a dazzling smile for the cameraman. “Okay, let’s go bring our special brand of style to Daniel Jackson. The Queer Eye guys are ready to roll!”

With that, the quintet of men descended on the building and into Daniel’s life.

~*~*~*~*~*~

Daniel took a deep breath as he watched the action on the street in front of his building.

Maybe this hadn’t been such a great idea after all. His eyes widened as the five distinctive looking men piled out of a white van, followed by several men carrying cameras and lighting equipment. He knew this was all part of the “Queer Eye” experience, and that it would be videotaped.

He could only hope that General Hammond didn’t kill him when this was over. Jack would probably laugh about this for years. The whole SGC would probably never tire of ribbing him about his ‘makeover.’ He could only be thankful that the Gou’ald did not have access to TV.

Still, ever since Teal’c had mentioned the show, he’d been taping and watching it whenever he got downtime. While the premise was rather strange, he had to admit, he’d become fascinated by watching these five gay men work makeover magic on straight men, both married and single. He’d been impressed enough by the transitions that he’d decided to write and make his case. Of course, he’d figured he’d never be chosen, after all, there were so many others out there, he assumed, who needed a makeover more than he did.

But when they’d contacted him a month ago, he’d suddenly realized what he’d gotten himself into. Obviously, he had something they were looking for and more obviously, they thought there was potential in him.

He shuddered as he heard Jack’s teasing voice in his head. His best friend would never let him live it down.

Forcing his apprehension down, he replaced it with the imagined look of awe in Janet’s eyes as she saw his changed appearance and, hopefully, stylish new style. The image of her passionately kissing him was enough to heat his cheeks. Turning his thoughts to a little tamer track, he smiled as he realized it would be worth it to show those damn nurses and those on base that there was more to Daniel Jackson than just saving the world on a nearly daily basis.

The knock on his door startled him from his thoughts. Taking a deep breath, he moved around his still half unpacked apartment and walked over to the door. He was really going to do this.

/Well, it can’t be worse than facing an armed force of Jaffa and one seriously pissed off system lord./

The thought firmly cemented in his mind, he opened the door.

/Or not./

~*~*~*~*~*~

An hour later, Daniel actually found himself wishing for a squad of armed Jaffa. Even the fishing that Jack talked so fondly of at his cabin would be preferable to listening to a lecture on fabric and colors that matched his eyes.

“Now, Daniel, we need to showcase those wonderful arms, so muscled, I really need to know your workout routine.” Carson, he thought the man’s name was, punctuated his words by squeezing said muscles, making him rather uncomfortable. He was tempted to reply with “fighting aliens on strange new worlds on a daily basis,” but figured that would truly be a case of too much information.

“Lots of physical activity,” was what he chose to go with, trying not to wince at the brightly colored shirt Carson was holding up to his chest.

Daniel sighed as he heard the answering murmur from the man behind the camera. He figured he now knew the meaning of the term ‘fishbowl.’ The two gay men were one thing, but having every move recorded was rather unnerving. He was only thankful these men had not delved too much into his ‘job description.’ The less said the better, he figured.

“Okay, Daniel, this is the perfect outfit for entertaining after a long day of digging in ruins.” He watched as Carson held up a sky blue shirt that seemed to have very few buttons in the front, pairing them up with a pair of khaki pants that looked far too small for what he normally wore.

“Um, what size are those pants-”

“They’ll fit, trust me, Daniel. Besides, we want to show off your attributes and your cute little tush is definitely show offable.” He tried not to shudder as Carson winked and patted him on the butt. “Now this outfit does just that, with just enough color to bring out the healthy glow of your skin after a day in the sun, dressy enough to say you care about your appearance, but casual enough to make everyone feel comfortable with the new you.”

“I don’t know if I’ll be comfortable with the new me,” he muttered under his breath, earning a laugh from the man at his side.

“When the ladies start noticing, you’ll change your mind. Besides, looking as adorable as we’re going to make you, the ladies won’t stand a chance. And you want the ladies to notice, don’t you?”

Daniel sighed as he was pushed towards the dressing room, although he had to admit, his mind was now filled with images of Janet checking out his butt. Resigned to his fate, he stepped into the changing room and began to try on the numerous outfits Carson had picked out.

~*~*~*~*~

It was almost a relief to sink into a chair at one of Colorado Springs more upscale salons. Daniel gratefully accepted the bottle of water Kyan handed him, taking a long drink and trying to ignore the fact that the other man was now running his fingers through his hair.

“You’ve got good color, but it’s a little washed out. I’m thinking we add a few darker hi-lites which will then accentuate the blonde that I’m guessing the sun puts in your hair.”

Daniel cringed at the thought of hair coloring, remembering something Sam had once said about a friend who’d had a dye job go wrong and ended up with blue hair for weeks.

“You’re sure we need to put dye in my hair-”

“Daniel, it’s hi-liting, and trust me, the results will be spectacular.” Kyan patted him lightly on the shoulder as he motioned a stylist over. “I’m thinking we need to shape his hair a little more, maybe a slight layered look-”

This was where the foot went down. Thankfully, he had a good excuse. “Okay, we can’t mess with the hair cut, considering whom I work for.” He was proud of the response, although the sparkle in Kyan’s eye made him leery.

“We’re not going to do more than shape it a bit, and if I remember right, you’re not exactly IN the military, are you?”

Damn. The man had done his background reading. Sighing, he realized there was no escape. “Okay, do what you want, just remember, I don’t have a lot of time to fuss with my hair.”

Closing his eyes, he settled back into his chair and allowed the stylist to take over.

~*~*~*~*~

An hour later he opened his eyes and hesitantly looked towards the mirror that was being held out to him.

“Perfect! Exactly the look we were going for!”

Kyan’s enthusiastic words made him a bit leery, but he realized there was no going back. Glancing at his reflection, he did a double take.

He actually did not look half bad. In fact, turning to get a sideways glimpse of his profile, he thought he looked rather good. His hair hadn’t changed in style much, but it had a little more of the ‘shaggy’ look he’d used to wear in his early years with the SGC, pre-ascension. The color too was not drastic, the hi-lites noticeable but not overpowering.

“It’s not bad,” he managed, wincing again at the cheer Kyan and the photographer exchanged.

“Not bad, Daniel, you look like a new man! A rugged, manly, yet perfectly groomed new man. Trust me, the ladies won’t know what hit them!”

Daniel couldn’t help but smile at the enthusiasm in Kyan’s voice. The smile faded however as the taller man suddenly walked over to a table of what looked like cosmetics and picked up a small, circular container.

“Now, we just need to do something about that problem skin.”

Daniel’s eyes widened as the man moved towards him, taking a gob of a white, gooey substance on his fingers. “Um, what exactly is that?” Kyan’s laughter did not make him feel better.

“Moisturizer, darling. Essential to someone in your profession, especially after those long days in the sun at a dig.”

Daniel was tempted to correct the man, but figured it would be too convoluted an explanation not to mention a breech of classified information to boot. He bit his lip as Kyan smeared some of the moisturizer on his skin, all while talking into the camera.

“Your skin is rather dry, expected, as I said, from your profession. This is an oil free moisturizer that should help replenish the moisture in your skin if you use it every morning before heading out.”

Daniel simply closed his eyes and allowed Kyan to do whatever it was that was being done to his face. Instead, he tortured himself by thinking of what Jack would say when this actually aired on TV in a few months.

What the hell had he gotten himself into?

~*~*~*~*~*~

Two days later, Daniel found it a relief to be settled in his temporary hotel room, pouring over the latest tablets that SG-10 had brought back from P3X-837. After two whirlwind days of shopping for clothing, furniture, etc., he was ready to escape his five over-eager friends for a night of pure, blessed, work.

Sure it wasn’t exactly convenient to be working out of a hotel, but at least it wasn’t in the presence of the Queer Eye quintet. Not to mention he’d told SG-1, who all had downtime for a week after a particularly harrowing mission to a hostile alien planet, that he was remodeling and fumigating his apartment. Which was how he’d acquired a base cell phone, so he was reachable in case of an emergency. He hoped, however, that it would be a quiet week, because he did not want to explain his ‘changes’ until they were complete.

He’d planned a ‘housewarming’ party for Saturday night, figuring that would be the perfect place to debut the ‘new Daniel.’ Everyone thought it was simply his way of settling in after being ascended for such a long time, which in a way, he supposed it was.

Still, he couldn’t help but feel a bit apprehensive of the reaction. Changing one’s apartment was one thing, changing one’s wardrobe and looks was another. For a moment, he wondered if Janet would really like the changes, or even notice.

/Of course she’ll notice. Why do you think she spends so much extra time on your checkups and physicals? And those looks you catch her giving you when she thinks you’re not looking. She likes you, and she’ll love the new, improved, less ‘geekish’ you./

He was brought out of his revelry by the ringing of his cell phone. Feeling a slight tinge of panic that something was wrong, he grabbed the phone and punched the ‘send’ button before offering a “hello.”

“Danny boy, how you doing in that hotel room? Ordering plenty of room service I hope?”

Jack’s voice made him smile, and since it didn’t sound too urgent, he assumed that this was purely a social call. Settling back into the chair he truly relaxed for what might have been the first time in days.

“Actually, I’ve been working constantly, not much time for room service.” It wasn’t a lie, he had not time with all the ‘fittings’ and ‘pickings’ he was being forced to endure.

“Well, let me tell you, we can’t wait to see how your apartment looks when this is done.”

His heart stopped a moment, wondering if Jack had figured out his secret. There hadn’t been many cameras around, but people in this town did talk. Thankfully, he didn’t know many of them.

“Well, Jack, it’s nothing too radical.” And at least he hoped it wasn’t. The décor he’d chosen was not anything too extreme, although he only had the ‘guys’ words to go on.

“Still, this is good for you. Settling back into your life and your apartment. Maybe you’ll move some of those rocks out and get yourself that flat screen I’ve been telling you about.”

Daniel sighed, rubbing the bridge of his nose, having fought this battle before. “Jack, what do I need a flat screen TV for? I hardly ever watch TV, hell, I’m hardly ever home-”

“Ah but when you are, Space Monkey, you need stereo sound and crystal clear picture to watch such classics as the Simpson’s on.”

Daniel couldn’t help but laugh. “You mean so you’ll have stereo sound and crystal clear picture when you and Teal’c descend on my apartment to watch the Simpson’s and Star Wars.”

Jack’s laughter was clearly audible through the phone line. “You know me too well, Danny Boy. Then again, there’s also the curling matches, don’t want to miss a chance to see a good bonspiel! But you know, I’m not the only one who might come around more if you spruce up the place a bit.”

Perking up, Daniel knew it was a trap, but he was more than willing to take the bait if this was leading where he thought it was. “Okay, I’ll bite.”

Laughter again came down the line. “I’m pretty sure our lovely Doc wouldn’t mind cuddling up with you in front of that big screen and watching some chick flick.”

Even though Jack couldn’t see it, Daniel blushed profusely. It wasn’t like he’d outrightly said anything to his best friend about his feelings for Janet, but Jack was a lot smarter than most people gave him credit for. Still, it didn’t mean he was right.

“Right. I’m sure that’s on top of Janet’s list of ‘things to do with Daniel,’” he offered morosely, not realizing the opening he’d just given his gleeful friend.

“Oh, Danny Boy, I think you’re at the top of Janet’s list of things to do.”

Daniel choked on the sip of water he’d just taken, and it took him a few moments before he could reply to Jack’s hearty laughter. Although, his reply was not the cutting remark he’d hoped to offer.

“And you know this how?” Cursing the fact that he sounded far too eager, he resigned himself to having this discussion with Jack. He’d just swear him to secrecy when it was done, not that that would do much good.

“Trust me Danny, I’ve got eyes, and one other secret weapon.”

Again, he knew it was a setup, but he couldn’t resist. “Okay, what’s your other secret weapon.”

Dry laughter again rang through the phone. “The fact that my 2IC happens to be the Doc’s best friend and also happens to be fully aware of how you feel about the Doc and how she feels about you.”

The blush was back and he was only glad Jack couldn’t see him. Still, his heart beat a bit faster at the thought that Janet might actually be interested in him. There was only one way to find out.

“Okay, at the risk of sounding like a teenage girl, what does Sam say Janet feels about me?”

“Let’s just say that if you actually get up the guts to ask the Doc out, you won’t be disappointed in her answer.”

Daniel felt a smile break over his face. “Really? Janet really said she’d go out with me?” v “Actually, she did, and she added a few other things that I can’t get Sam to tell me. Not for lack of trying though.”

A frown appeared on his brow. “These other things, any idea if they’re good or bad? Or even somewhat good?”

Jack’s laughter again greeted him. “I suspect they’re good from the way Sam blushes when she tries to avoid the subject.”

The relief that mixed with anticipation in his blood gave him hope that maybe, just maybe, by the end of his ‘makeover week’ he would find Janet as receptive to his advances as Jack had seemed to imply.

Either that, or he’d have plenty of gay men competing for his attention.

He shuddered at the thought, focusing again on Jack and trying to get the conversation back to something resembling normal instead of sounding like gossipy teens.

“Well, I guess we’ll see when you all turn out for the housewarming.”

“I wouldn’t miss it for anything, especially if you actually manage to ask the Doc out this time.” The laughter annoyed Daniel, who bristled a bit in his reply.

“This time? What are you implying, Jack?”

“Oh come on, Danny. Everyone knows how you feel about the Doc, and the fact that you’re too chicken to do anything about it. You don’t think Sam and I are the only couple in the base betting pool, do you?”

Daniel was trying not to feel offended at his friend’s words, knowing Jack did not mean them maliciously. Still, they rankled all the same.

“Well, I think you’ll be in for a surprise when you see me, and the house, on Saturday.” He hoped it wasn’t giving away anything, but he felt the need to make some kind of response to Jack’s comment.

“We’ll see, Danny. You and surprise aren’t exactly words uttered in the same breath, not that that’s a bad thing. It’s nice to be predictable at times.”

Daniel was really feeling annoyed now, and figured it was best to end the conversation before he lost it and spilled everything. Besides, wouldn’t it be fun to see Jack’s expression at his ‘new look’ and ‘new style’ as well. He could only imagine his best friend eating his words, as he, Daniel Jackson, walked off with the most beautiful woman in the room.

“Well, we’ll see on Saturday. Talk to you later, Jack.”

Exchanging goodbyes, he hung up, taking a deep breath and focusing again on the tasks ahead of him. He’d much rather be in his living room, but that was not an option at the moment. The thought of the Queer Eye team in his apartment, however, only brought to mind the image of all his precious artifacts being misplaced. While he’d made the men promise to at least carefully store things that they didn’t deem ‘stylish’, and he’d removed anything really valuable already, he still shuddered at what he’d be walking into tomorrow.

Deciding that work was his most reasonable option at the moment, he forced all thoughts of clothing, furniture, and personal hair style from his mind, immersing himself once more in the haven of his work.

~*~*~*~*~*~

“You ready for this Daniel?”

Daniel gulped as he stood outside his apartment door, flanked by Carson and Kyan. Part of him was curious, another part worried. But, he’d gone to far to go back now.

“Ready as I’ll ever be.” Taking a deep breath, he pushed open the door and came face to face with three smiling men- and his completely redone apartment.

His eyes widened as he looked around his living room, the clutter of boxes and plethora of artifacts removed to reveal a tastefully decorated room. The oversize earth toned couch and loveseat he’d chosen were the centerpiece, flanked by small wooden end tables and a beautiful cherry wood coffee table. They’d taken up his carpet to reveal beautifully polished wood floors that actually seemed to accent the wood furniture.

Wooden shelves lined one side of the room, with wall shelves crafted into the other. To his surprise, many of his artifacts were displayed on the shelves, in much better positions than he’d had them in. His plethora of books were neatly organized, with several of his more interesting artifacts as bookends. Overall, his living room looked a whole lot less cluttered and definitely more homey.

“So, honey, what do you think?” Thom’s voice penetrated his thoughts and he found himself smiling amid the whoops his look brought to their faces.

“It works for me, it really, really does.” He marveled at the fact that he meant the words, moving around to touch and feel the furniture and his artifacts, just to make sure they were okay.

“We worked with what you have Daniel, and trust me, it was a challenge to figure out what to display and what to store. You’re obviously a pack rat, something you need to work on, especially if you’re going to entertain in this room.”

Nodding at Thom’s words, he moved through the living room, observing the changes. His eyes widened as he noticed another new addition to his living room that he did not remember making.

“As you see, we made more space, the sofas size adding a warmth and appeal to the room, don’t you just see yourself relaxing in front of your new flat screen TV?”

He gaped at the TV, remembering mentioning it in passing, but not thinking much about it. Still, he had to admit, it looked really good there on the wall, and it was positioned perfectly to accommodate to ‘cuddling’ on the new couch. His cheeks heated as he again pictured himself and Janet twined together on the couch, paying more attention to each other than the screen.

“I think he likes it, Thom. Let’s show him the kitchen!” The voices brought him out of his Janet induced haze and he eagerly followed the men into his kitchen, stopping in awe at what they’d done.

His kitchen had been rather dark and very utilitarian before. Not that he used it that much anyhow. Now though, it had been redone in tones of cream and blue, the décor looking very streamlined but definitely comfortable. Not that he cooked much, but what was more important, he could see Janet puttering around in this kitchen, knowing how much she liked making things when SG-1 got together outside of work.

“We’ve taken out the overhead cabinets to give you more space for your artifacts, and added a few shelves underneath the counter to store your dishes. Not that you have too many, but we also took care of that!”

Leaning down to look, he was surprised to see his mismatched plates now flanked by a set of dark blue ones, with matching bowls and salad plates.

“Um, I really don’t need these-”

“Nonsense,” chimed in Ted, who had been remarkably silent for the moment. “If you’re going to entertain, you need at least one set of matching dishes and we found these at a very good price. Trust me, a well set table works wonders.”

Daniel raised an eyebrow at the man, deciding to keep his thoughts to himself. At least the plates were in a color he liked. Looking at the new shelves in his kitchen, his smile brightened to see several of his more unusual artifacts gracing the walls.

“We figured they’d add a sense of excitement to the basicness of the kitchen. A good contrast and definitely conversation pieces,” Thom added with pride.

Daniel nodded, deciding he liked what they’d done here as well. But there was still one more room to examine. Feeling like a kid at Christmas, he headed for the bedroom, hearing the excited chatter behind him but paying it no mind.

Opening his bedroom door, he found himself in a different world. His king size bed remained the centerpiece of the room, but the comforter that covered it had gone from black to a deep blue. The curtains on his window matched the bed and pulled back as they were, gave the room a cheerier look, although, again, it was not too overpowering.

“Blue is definitely the color to go with, very manly and yet so sophisticated,” Thom offered, walking around and gesturing with huge hand motions. “And look at this, we’ve managed to find more shelving and display areas for your artifacts, but without taking away from the room or presenting a sense of clutter.”

“Refining clutter was big here, Daniel. You must work on it, too much of anything can never be a good thing.”

Daniel held back a comment at Ted’s words, deciding it was not worth it at the moment. Besides, he was more fascinated with how the men had managed to coordinate his artifacts with the motif of the room. He’d had no idea that such a thing was possible, did not even understand how it worked, but it did.

And his ancient statue from the ruins at Giza had never looked better than from its central position on his shelf. Without thinking, he motioned for the man with the camera to get a shot of the piece, ignoring the fact that all five men were now focusing on what decorated the wall directly across from his bed.

“Normally I don’t prefer things this long and hard to be this sharp and pointy, but what are you going to do?”

The words made him do a double take as he turned to find Carson gingerly holding one of his medieval swords, oblivious to the fact that it was an original piece from the middle ages and worth more than two years worth of his salary. Sighing, he moved to take the sword, not trusting the man to hold onto it.

“You are going to put that sword back for the moment,” he offered, replacing the sword carefully, ignoring the teasing comments coming from the men behind him.

“Okay, your apartment is ready to entertain, your wardrobe and style are good to go, now we move onto one of the most important parts of this experience, the food!”

Ted’s eager words made him cringe, especially knowing how bad he was at doing anything more than boiling water. Still, he was almost done and for the moment, he was pretty excited about getting his friend’s reactions to the lack of ‘clutter’ they always teased him about on the few times they’d come to visit.

Feeling better than he had in a while, he followed the men to the kitchen with a smile on his face.

~*~*~*~*~

“First things first, let’s concentrate on the appetizers. It’s always important to have appealing appetizers, because, let’s face it darling, clichéd as it might sound, you never get a second change to make a first impression.”

Daniel raised an eyebrow as Ted bustled around the kitchen, gathering a bunch of ingredients Daniel did not recognize. He was a little curious about what some of the ingredients were, but he figured all would be explained in time. Although, he really couldn’t see Jack or Teal’c responding well to some type of finger food garnished by some kind of exotic looking leaf.

“Um, you know, the friends I have coming over might want something a little more substantial-”

“Don’t beat around the bush, you mean ‘manly,’ don’t you, Daniel?” Ted’s voice held a hint of amusement Daniel was thankful to note. Shrugging his shoulders in response he smiled sheepishly.

“Jack and Te-, Murray,” he quickly corrected himself, “well, they’re definitely more meat and potatoes men. Although Sam and Janet might like the more exotic-”

“Don’t worry, we’ll have something to suit everyone, just listen up!” Ted’s commanding voice brought him back to the present and he sighed as he moved over to observe what the smaller man was doing.

“No matter what type of person you are, everyone likes fried potatoes, don’t they?” Daniel nodded, not sure if he was to respond to the question. He sighed in relief as Ted simply nodded.

“What we’re going to do is actually fry up some potatoes with a special seasoning. A smaller version of potato skins, and definitely a healthier version.” Bustling around the kitchen, Daniel watched in fascination as Ted proceeded to transform two potatoes into an appetizer that actually looked rather appealing.

“All you have to remember is the key to any good, low-fat recipe… E-V-O-O.” Daniel looked puzzled at the word, and at the liquid that Ted was pouring into a frying pan.

“Evoo?”

Ted looked at him as if he’d said something sacrilegious. “Extra Virgin Olive Oil. It’s all the rage for healthy cooking now a days.”

“Oh, I’ll have to remember that,” Daniel replied, settling back again to watch Ted at work. Ten minute later, the wiry man gave a crow of triumph and presented him with a plate full of delicious looking fried potatoes.

“There you have it, healthy potato skins but your ‘manly’ friends won’t know the difference. Serve them with a little fat free sour cream and fat free cheddar cheese and you add more flavor, not fat.”

Daniel was trying to take it all in, knowing it was a simple process, but hoping he could remember it all. He figured if he could translate dead languages, he could easily remember how to cut up and fry a few potatoes, couldn’t he?

“Now, you need something a little healthier and a little more decorative to brighten up your table. That’s where these gourmet crackers and cheese will work perfectly!”

Fascinated now, Daniel watched as Ted took several ordinary crackers and turned them into what resembled small works of art, using several kinds of cheeses, cherry tomatoes and a couple of the leaves he now recognized as fresh parsley.

“There you have it, a healthy, colorful plate of appetizers that work well with various wines and mixed drinks!” The excitement in Ted’s voice made Daniel smile, having to admit the plate the man had fixed looked very appealing. He tried to imagine what Janet might think at seeing it on his table and he smiled as he realized it resembled something he could have sworn she’d made for one of their get togethers years ago.

“Looks good to me, and it seems relatively simple to prepare,” he offered in reply, wondering at the raised eyebrow he got in return.

“Well, we’ll see, but I have every confidence you can do this!” Ted looked a little apprehensive Daniel noted, but it seemed to pass as the man headed for the bottles of alcohol that had seemed to amass on his kitchen counter.

“Now comes the fun part, the alcohol!”

Daniel winced, knowing his track record with alcohol was not exactly stellar. He tended to drink very little, seeing as that his tolerance was extremely low, as he’d learned throughout the years by trying to keep up with Jack O’Neill.

“Don’t look so scared, even if you’re not a heavy drinker, you can certainly put on a flare for your guests who are!” The reassurance in Ted’s voice made him feel a slight bit better as he moved forward.

“From what I found on your wine rack, I assume you’re a fan of both red and white, so we got a few bottles of merlot and chardonnay. All are geared to go well with the flavors in your appetizers.”

Daniel smiled as the man took a healthy drink of the glass of wine he’d poured, taking a small sip of the glass he’d been offered. He did like wine, and he had to admit, this chardonnay was quite nice. Not too dry, but not too sweet. It had potential.

“Good, now let’s delve into the wonderful world of tequila and all its beautiful uses.”

With that, Ted pulled him forward and Daniel allowed himself to get immersed in directions on how to make a perfect, yet unique, strawberry margarita.

He brightened as something suddenly occurred to him. It was a well-know fact that one Doctor Janet Fraiser had a weakness for margaritas. Smiling, unaware that the cameraman had focused in on his face and his secretive smile, he focused all his attention on what Ted was trying to teach.

~*~*~*~*~*~

Saturday afternoon found a very nervous Daniel puttering around the apartment, attending to several last minute cleaning matters. Overall the place looked spotless and he was rather proud of it. He made a mental not to thank the ‘guys’ when this was all over.

But while his home pleased him, his nerves were still strung high on how Janet might feel about all this. He was determined to end this night by asking her out, and hopefully, he could manage it without having it taped for airing to millions of people.

Which brought up another matter he hadn’t thought of until now. Jack’s reaction to the camera crews that would be observing their initial meeting and some of the ‘party.’ Knowing his friend was prone to acting before thinking, it might be best to heed the adage ‘forewarned is forearmed.’ Which meant he had to tell someone what was going on, and there was only one person he could think of to tell that could handle Jack. Sighing, he reached for the phone.

“Hello, Sam?” he asked as the phone was picked up. Getting an affirmative, he took a deep breath and explained what he could from the beginning. Ten minutes later he wound out of words and stopped, greeted with dead silence from his friend. “Sam? You still there?”

“You had the Queer Eye guys give you a makeover?” The incredulous sound of Sam’s voice made him uneasy.

“Well, Teal’c suggested it-”

“Teal’c?!”

Well, when you said it out loud, it did seem rather strange. Still, it was the truth. “He suggested this show and I didn’t think they’d respond, but they did, and well, I actually like what they did. The question is, can you handle it and can you handle Jack’s reaction?”

The sigh on the other end was quickly followed by a burst of laughter. “You do realize we’ll have to tell him, and I’m thinking surprise is good to a degree. You leave it to me and Teal’c and we’ll make sure he doesn’t punch anyone out when he arrives, okay?”

Daniel breathed a sigh of relief at his friend’s acceptance. Overall, that had gone quite well.

“So, Daniel, can I ask you something?” Feeling apprehensive, he nevertheless answered ‘yes.’

“Are you doing this for Janet?”

Well, never let it be said that Sam could not be as direct as her CO.

“I’m doing it for a lot of reasons, Sam,” was all he chose to reply with, thankful when she seemed to accept it and changed the subject. After a few more moments, he said goodbye to his friend, glad to know that the Jack problem had at least been dampened. He had a feeling his friend would have a few choice words to say about the matter, but he only hoped they wouldn’t be on camera. Although, there was always the editing phase.

Deciding he’d done what damage control he could, he headed into the kitchen to try his hand at making the appetizers.

~*~*~*~*~

“Oh, look at that! He’s actually going to drop the potatoes into the skillet, FILLED with hot oil, in one movement!”

Ted’s voice echoed throughout the room where the five men were watching Daniel attempt to recreate the appetizers he’d been shown earlier.

“Well, he’ll learn fast enough that hot oil and bare skin- OUCH!” All five men jumped as Daniel yelped and jumped back, waving his hands in the air and dropping a handful of potatoes in the process.

“That had to hurt, poor man,” Thom winced as he took a sip of his champagne.

“Well, at least he’s washing his hands under cold water, and look, he’s going to do it one at a time now, he learns from experience!” Jai’s crow was met with cheers from the men as they settled back to comment on Daniel’s cooking form.

“You know, I think he might actually get it right,” Ted murmured as he watched Daniel successfully begin to fry the potatoes.

“Well, let’s just see if he can handle drinks and dressing himself. That’s where they usually have issues,” Carson sniffed as he smiled fondly at the man on screen.

“I think he’s doing pretty well, for an archaeologist/anthropologist who works for the government. Speaking of which, what exactly does an archaeologist/anthropologist do for the government?”

The five men looked at each other and shrugged at Kyan’s question before turning back to the monitor in front of them.

~*~*~*~*~*~

It was now ten minutes to 7 and his friends would be arriving any moment. Daniel took one final look in his bedroom mirror, pleased with the blue shirt and khaki pants he’d chosen, hoping against hope that Carson had been right in his fashion choice. While it wasn’t his usual look, he had to admit, the shirt did bring out the blue of his eyes and the hi-lites in his hair. Overall, he thought he’d never looked better.

~*~*~*~*~*~

“You know, that outfit is perfect for him, and you’re right Kyan, glasses are the way for him to go.” Jai toasted the archaeologist as they watched him preening in front of his mirror.

“I still think he looks divine without his glasses, but I have to admit, with them, he’s got that ruggedly attractive, scientific yet vulnerable appeal.” Carson raised his glass as well, thoroughly pleased with the results of his tutelage.

~*~*~*~*~*~

Daniel was in the kitchen, putting the final touches on his rather pretty looking appetizers when the doorbell rang. Taking a deep breath, he moved towards the door, looking towards the two cameramen who followed.

“Um, if I were you, I’d stay back a bit,” he offered, hiding his amusement at the looks the two men shot each other. Thankfully, he noticed, they stayed at a distance.

/Well, here goes nothing/

Plastering on a smile, he opened his door to the most important people in his life.

~*~*~*~*~*~

“What’s going on?”

Jack’s voice held a hint of suspicion as he allowed Sam to lead him into the elevator. Teal’c followed, his expression neutral as the elevator doors closed behind them.

“Jack, just keep calm, okay?” Sam had been trying to find the right way to tell Jack about the Queer Eye men, but so far, hadn’t had much luck. Now she was running out of time.

“What’s wrong with Daniel?” Jack had a bad feeling, noting the looks his two friends were giving him.

“Nothing is wrong with DanielJackson, O’Neill. MajorCarter is, I believe, attempting to prepare you to face several men with video cameras when you enter DanielJackson’s apartment.”

“Videocameras? Sam?” Jack looked totally confused as Sam looked helplessly at Teal’c. The Jaffa simply nodded his head.

“I do believe the Extremely Happy Men have visited DanielJackson and given him what is called a do-over.”

Sam nearly choked at Jack’s expression. “He means makeover, Jack, makeover.” But Jack didn’t seem to hear her words, his gaze locked on Teal’c.

“Extremely Happy Men?”

Teal’c looked at him his expression never changing. “I believe they are from a program called “Queer Eye for the Linear Man.”

Sam did choke this time, even as she watched Jack’s face turn an unbecoming shade of purple.

“Queer Eye for the Straight Guy? Is that what you mean, Teal’c?” Jack hoped his voice did not sound as horrified as he felt. What the hell had his best friend gotten himself into?

Sam knew she had to say something, but nothing would come out. All she could do was look at Teal’c with a pleading expression. The Jaffa however seemed to be unaware of his friends’ feelings, as he continued on conversationally.

“That is it. I recommended he ask them for help when he approached me a short time ago.”

Jack looked like he was having trouble breathing. “Daniel, our Daniel Jackson, went to you to ask about getting a makeover? From a bunch of gay men?”

“I see no problem with getting this ‘makeover’ from a group of happy men. Would you not want them to be happy about their work?”

Jack sank back against the wall, rubbing a hand over his forehead. “Teal’c, buddy, I don’t think you’re getting the meaning of the word ‘gay’ as used here.” Looking over at Sam, he found her unable to speak as well, although he noted she seemed to have been in on this as well. He would make sure they had a little talk when all this was over.

“What do you mean, O’Neill?”

Running a hand through his hair, he tried to figure out how to explain ‘gay’ to Teal’c without sounding like an awkward teen. Thankfully, before he could finish, the elevator arrived and Jack bolted out as if the devil was on his heels.

Taking a deep breath, he steeled himself to face his friend, his mind already running wild with images of what these people had done to Daniel.

“Jack, please, no matter what, don’t lose it, okay? This is really, really important to Daniel, and he’ll be devastated if you do something to wreck it, okay?”

Jack looked at her with a reproachful expression. ‘You think I don’t know that? You think I don’t know that more than likely, the reason Danny subjected himself a group of gay men obsessed with the perfect clothing scheme and paint color, not to mention an unhealthy need for hair gel, is because he wants to impress Janet?”

Sam sighed as she looked at her CO. “I know you do, but I’m not so sure Daniel does. You know how much your opinion means to him, though he’ll never let it show.”

Jack sighed, again running a hand over his face. He did know, and it made all the difference in the world.

“It’s okay, Sam, I won’t do anything stupid. I promise,” he muttered, reaching Daniel’s door and knocking on it. But before it could be opened, he felt Sam’s hand on his arm.

“Just out of curiosities sake, Jack, how do you know so much about Queer Eye for the Straight Guy?”

The expression on his face was priceless and it did not fade as the door opened and all three got a good look at their friend and teammate.

~*~*~*~*~*~

Daniel wasn’t sure what to make of Jack’s expression, although something told him it was not exactly meant for him.

“Heyguys,comeonin,” his words were nearly incomprehensible as he rushed through them, watching his friends closely for a reaction. Sam and Teal’c looked bemused but it was Jack’s expression that still worried him. “Jack, youokaywiththings?” He watched apprehensively as his best friend struggled to say something, or most likely, comprehend his words.

“Well, at least they didn’t make you a true blonde and dress you in pink.”

Daniel wasn’t sure what to make of his friend’s words, not sure if to take them as a compliment or criticism.

“Daniel, you know what Jack’s trying to say. You look great! They hi-lited your hair didn’t they?” Sam was truly amazed at how different Daniel looked. It wasn’t even anything major, but it was subtle enough that she once again realized how handsome a man he was. Although, no one could compare to Jack, but Daniel sure came close. She had a feeling Janet was going to be beside herself.

“DanielJackson, you do indeed look well. I see the Extremely Happy Men also provided your apartment with a do over.”

“Makeover, Tea-, Murray, makeover” Daniel replied, covering his slip as the cameras rolled.

~*~*~*~*~

“Extremely Happy Men?” Jai’s expression mirrored his words.

“That man did not just call us “Extremely Happy Men,” did he?” Carson sounded just as horrified as Jai.

“I’m still shuddering at that skull cap the man is wearing, how totally gauche!” Kyan shuddered at the image, closing his eyes almost as if he could make the image go away.

“Well, I personally am a bit offended over that Jack’s comment on our abilities. Obviously, he has a bias against homosexuals.” Thom sniffed as he observed the four people on screen in front of him.

“But there is hope for the blonde, Sam, I think he called her. Although, something tells me she’s not the woman he’s hoping to impress,” Ted chimed in as he sipped his third glass of champagne.

“Let the games begin, it’s time for the appetizers!” crowed Carson as they settled back to watch.

~*~*~*~*~

Jack was looking around his friend’s apartment in surprise. While he was glad to note Daniel did not look extremely different, he did notice the younger man seemed a little more confident as he showed them around his newly refurnished place.

“Well, I like what they did to clear up the clutter that used to be your living room.” He smiled as Daniel laughed, glad to see his friend relaxing around him. He did his best to ignore the camera that was following him around.

“You can actually see and appreciate your art now Daniel, I love it! And the colors are perfectly you. What I wouldn’t give for perfect hardwood floors like this,” Sam sighed with longing.

“Well, I have to admit, I do like the warmth it gives to the room,” Daniel replied, happy to note Jack seemed to be relaxing. He knew it was going to be all right as Jack finally caught sight of the flat screen TV.

“I take back everything I ever said about gay men, Daniel, they got you to get a flat screen, and a 52 inch at that!”

Daniel tried hard not to laugh as Jack began to examine his TV, nearly salivating as he turned it on and began fiddling with the channels.

“You know, if you’d allowed him to see this first, we could have avoided the awkwardness at the door,” Sam whispered to her friend as he smiled.

“Well, at least he’s not glaring daggers at the camera guys anymore,” he replied, smiling as Jack settled himself on the sofa, Teal’c taking the other end.

“Danny boy, come show me how this works. There’s some hockey to be watched somewhere!”

With a smile for Sam, Daniel moved towards his friend, glad to see it appeared that his friends were making themselves at home.

Sam watched as the boys began to examine the remote, smiling as she noted the cameramen focusing in on the debate. A sudden thought hit her that they were being watched by five men, somewhere in town, and would soon be seen on national TV. She paled at the thought, but quickly regained her footing as she realized how different Daniel seemed.

She’d never seen her friend so confident, nor looking so well. The apartment was completely done in his style and for the first time, she could admit she felt comfortable relaxing in her friend’s home. Maybe it had something to do with the fact that the huge busts of lions and ancient mummies had been moved somewhere else.

The knock on the door startled her as she realized the most important person of the evening had just arrived. She noted the quick look of panic on Daniel’s face as he stopped speaking mid sentence and glanced to the door.

“Just do it, Danny, you know she wants you too.”

Jack’s clear voice rang through the room, bringing a flush to his cheeks, but a determination to his step as he took a deep breath and headed for the door.

~*~*~*~*~

“Oooooh, this must be it! The woman of the hour arrives!” Jai eagerly moved forward on the couch, as the other four stopped chatting and were now avidly watching the screen in front of them.

“The big moment arrives. Let’s see if he can pull it off without embarrassing himself.” Ted’s words were echoed by the others as they watched Daniel open the door.

~*~*~*~*~

Daniel held his breath as he pulled open the door and found himself staring into the most beautiful pair of eyes he’d ever seen.

“Hi, Janet,” he offered, his voice softer than usual as he watched her eyes, hoping for a reaction.

Janet wasn’t sure what to say to the man who opened the door. She’d hear rumors that Daniel’s apartment was not the only thing getting a makeover, but she hadn’t been sure until now.

He didn’t look extremely different. His hair had obvious hi-lites but they only served to enhance the deep blue of his eyes. His outfit was definitely not the usual for Daniel, but the blue shirt showcased his broad chest and the arm muscles she’d watched slowly reappear as he’d worked out with Jack daily since his return.

What was different was the look in his eyes. Normally they were friendly and full of a warmth that made her stomach tingle. Tonight, however, they were filled with a heat that seemed to reach out and devour her as he stared hungrily into her eyes. But what really got to her was the slight bit of neediness, of insecurity she could also read in those blue depths. He was worried about what she’d think.

“Daniel, you look wonderful.” It was rather cheesy, but she really didn’t think herself capable of saying more. Not that she needed to if the brilliance of his smile was anything to go by.

“You like? I had some help this week,” he offered, breathing a sigh of relief as she stepped into the apartment and took a wide eyed glance around.

“Daniel! It’s beautiful! I can’t believe what you’ve done with the place!” Her enthusiasm was contagious as she shrugged off her coat and turned to take in the people and the room before her. She was so involved in taking in the room that she completely missed the expression on Daniel’s face as he caught sight of what she was wearing.

Five other men, however, did not.

~*~*~*~*~*~

“Wham! Did you see that look? Our boy’s got it bad!”

“Oooh, what I wouldn’t give to be that Janet tonight!”

“Daniel is on the prowl, go get her boy!”

“Now that is what I call a classy lady.”

“I love that sweater on her!” Carson’s voice was jubilant, drawing the stares of the other four. “Its clingy enough yet not too revealing. Tantalizing and yet completely chic for the moment. Paired with that skirt, and those legs, ummm, it’s a wonder Daniel doesn’t drop to his knees right now!”

The others rolled their eyes as they turned their attention back to the screen and the true soap opera that was unfolding before their eyes.

~*~*~*~*~

Daniel wasn’t sure he could speak as he took in Janet’s appearance. If he’d ever had any doubt about her beauty, not that he had, but if he had mind you, there was no question about it now. The sweater showcased her soft curves to perfection and the short skirt showed off a pair of legs to die for. Suddenly extremely nervous, he tried to find something to say, swallowing around the lump in his throat.

“So, you really like it, Janet?”

Her soft smile was all the answer he needed. “I love it Daniel, although, I’m curious to know why we’re being videotaped?” Her voice, thankfully, did not sound angry, just a little confused.

“He’s going to be the next star makeover on Queer Eye for the Straight Guy, Janet,” Jack offered with a rakish smile, delighting in Daniel’s blush and Janet’s raised eyebrow.

“Really? You had all five of them come give you and your apartment a makeover?” The curiosity in her expression made him feel better and he simply shrugged and smiled.

“What can I say, except, I hope you don’t mind being on national TV for a few moments.”

Janet’s laughter echoed through the room as she turned and waved into the camera. “Carson, Jai, Thom, Ted and Kyan, I just have to say if I didn’t love you guys before, I truly adore you all now. Thank you!”

~*~*~*~*~*~

Cheers and catcalls abounded from the five men in question as they heard her response.

“Well, looks like we’ve got a fan in the crowd,” Kyan called with a huge smile.

“I knew I liked that woman from the start,” Thom offered, raising his glass in yet another toast.

“Check out Jack’s expression, it’s priceless!” came from Jai.

“You know, it does my heart good to see this,” replied Ted with a huge smile.

“Hallelujah! I think our boy just scored big time!” Carson’s happy cheer was met with another round of toasts.

~*~*~*~*~

“You obviously watch the show, Janet?” Daniel was a little amused, but purely delighted that she had no problem with his ‘makeover’ pals.

“I love the show, Daniel and I can’t wait to see this whole transformation process from the start. Why didn’t you tell me, us?” She amended quickly, finally realizing the others watching them.

“Well, it wouldn’t have exactly been a surprise then, would it, Doc?” Jack’s droll voice made the others laugh, especially Daniel who was floating on cloud nine as he steered Janet towards the loveseat.

“DanielJackson, do these men not teach you to cook something as well?”

Daniel laughed. “Hungry, Murray?” He hated having to remember to call Teal’c by his alias, but with TV cameras around, one couldn’t be too careful. He could only imagine what the five men were thinking of Teal’c’s hat.

“Yeah, what you got to eat? I hope it’s not any of those girly appetizers they usually make the men make on this show.”

The others again turned to Jack with raised eyebrows. He shrugged sheepishly before giving them all a rakish smile. “Hey, a guy’s gotta watch something between the periods of a hockey game. It’s usually the only thing on.”

The others burst into laughter as Daniel headed for the kitchen. “Don’t worry, Jack, I mentioned the fact to them that you needed something a bit more hearty to appease your masculinity.”

Jack’s offended huff was clearly audible as Daniel returned with the plate of fried potatoes. “Here you go, freshly made potato skins, with a little cheddar cheese and sour cream for decoration.”

“Daniel, that’s beautiful!” Sam was impressed by the colors on the plate and the way Daniel had organized them. She hadn’t realized her friend had such a flare for the dramatic in cooking.

“Danny boy, please don’t tell me they had you wearing an apron while making this?” Jack offered, eagerly reaching for one of the snacks. The expression on his face was priceless as he bit into one, chewing a moment before swallowing. Daniel watched with apprehension, until a huge smile dawned on his friend’s face.

“Not bad, although you got any ketchup in there?”

The others laughed and reached for the food as Daniel happily headed for the kitchen again, returning a few moments later with the plate of crackers and the ketchup.

“Wow, Daniel, Ted must have taught you pretty well, they look fabulous!” Janet was majorly impressed with the appetizers and the fact that Daniel had made them. She knew how the show worked and that after being shown what to do, he’d been left on his own to recreate them. It looked like he’d been a fast learner.

“Well, glad you like. Now would anyone like a drink? I personally want to try out a new recipe they gave me for a strawberry margarita, Janet?” He aimed his question to the group but looked directly at Janet.

“I’d love one, Daniel, do you need any help?” The soft offer made his eyes shine as he motioned for her to follow him.

“I’d love it, anyone else for a margarita?” He chose to ignore the evil smile Jack was giving him.

“You know, Danny Boy, if it’s not too much trouble, I’d love a beer. Although if you’re going to get busy in the kitchen with the Doc,” he paused, winking at his friend’s mortified expression, “I mean by making margarita’s, then I’ll get one myself.”

Janet held back her blush, although she had to admit, the thought of ‘getting busy’ with Daniel was not unappealing, especially after the way he was behaving tonight.

“I’ll get you a beer, Jack.” Daniel was glad his voice remained calm. “Sam, Murray, anything for you?” After getting a beer and a soda request respectively, he followed Janet into the kitchen and set about getting his friends their drinks. Once they’d been delivered, he returned to where Janet was setting out ingredients beside the blender.

“Janet, I can make that-”

“Oh, I know,” she offered with a twinkling smile. “I just figured I’d get everything set out for you, then I’ll stand back and watch. This is always the fun part.” She grinned before hopping up on the counter, making his mouth water as the move exposed more of her legs.

Pushing down the images Jack had planted in his mind of Janet and the kitchen, he set about trying to remember how to make the perfect margarita.

~*~*~*~*~*~

“You know, the tension is incredible, he just needs to ask her out before I run in there and do it for him!”

Jai’s tense words echoed through the room, getting groans from the other four.

“He’ll get there, I just hope its before we turn old and gray while waiting,” offered Kyan gloomily.

“Wait, wait, wait, I think he’s going for it!” Carson’s eager voice had all attention once again directed at the TV.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Daniel had just finished the margarita and was now waiting for Janet’s taste test. He tried not to sink to the floor as he watched her tongue emerge and daintily lick the salt from the rim of the glass before sipping the cool drink.

“Daniel, it’s wonderful!” The pure happiness on her face made him smile as well, and he had to fight the urge to simply lean down and kiss her in response. He just barely managed to check his reaction as he realized that it might be prudent to at least ask her out before putting the moves on her.

“You really do like it, not too sweet or sour?” At the shake of her head, he finally allowed himself to relax, pouring a glass for himself and sipping cautiously. It really wasn’t that bad, and he didn’t even like mixed drinks.

Janet watched him over the rim of her glass, wondering if he was finally about to get up the courage to ask her out. She hadn’t been quite sure how he felt, despite Sam’s assurances that he was interested, but his actions tonight had her hoping what her friend had said was true.

Daniel took another sip of the margarita, using it to build up his courage as he tried to find the words to ask her out. As he struggled to think, he suddenly realized that cameras were trained on their every move. He really, really didn’t want this to happen on national TV.

“Um, guys,” he asked, motioning to the cameramen, who simply nodded. “Do you think we could have a bit of privacy?” Exchanging looks, the cameramen smiled at each other before nodding.

“No problem, good luck, man,” one offered as he and the other guy turned and left the room.

Janet was trying to control her rapidly beating heart, aware now that she was truly alone with Daniel. Taking a deep gulp of her drink, she gave him a smile. “Daniel, is there something you wanted to ask?”

Daniel knew in that moment that it would be okay. A huge smile graced his face as he walked over to stand next to her. Taking a deep breath, he smiled into her eyes.

“Janet, would you like to have dinner sometime with the new, stylish me?” He was pretty sure she’d say yes, but he held his breath just in case.

Janet smiled and reached up to brush her hand through his newly gelled hair. “Of course I’ll have dinner with the new, stylish you.” She winked at him before continuing. “I would have had dinner with the old you in a heartbeat as well, you know.”

Daniel’s mouth gaped at her as he registered her words. Struggling to speak, he finally found the words. “You mean, I didn’t have to go through all this, you would have gone out with me before I got ‘made over’?”

Janet smiled and leaned up, bringing his face down to hers. “Of course,” she offered before pressing her lips to his.

Daniel sighed into the kiss, wrapping his arms around her waist, amazed at how perfectly she fit into his arms. The kiss too was spectacular, ending only when they both had to part for breath, gasping for air.

“I wish you’d done that sooner,” Janet whispered, happily content to stay in his arms for the rest of the night.

“Well, now that I have, do you mind if I do it again?”

She could only nod before he swept down and claimed her lips in a deeper kiss. Both were unaware of anything but each other until a voice was heard clearing behind them. Pulling apart, they turned to face a stoic Teal’c.

“DanielJackson, DoctorFraiser, I do believe the Extremely Happy Men have arrived to meet you all.”

Janet and Daniel looked at each other and burst into laughter. When they finally stopped Daniel held out his arm to Janet, brushing a kiss over her lips before speaking.

“Well, you ready for this?”

Janet smiled and leaned up to whisper in his ear. “As long as you make sure I get to meet Carson, I’m ready for anything.” With a wink, she kissed him quickly before allowing him to lead her from the room.

Teal’c watched them go, the corner of his lips turned up in what his friends would be surprised note resembled a smile. Taking his time, he followed his friends into the living room, noting the enthusiasm with which the five newcomers were gushing over Daniel, Janet, Sam and a rather annoyed looking Jack.

Settling back onto the couch, Teal’c observed his friends, including an ecstatic looking Daniel. Leaning over to O’Neill, Teal’c made one final observation.

“Perhaps, now DanielJackson will also become an Extremely Happy Man, O’Neill.”

Jack looked at him with a strange expression. Deciding it was too complicated to explain he simply offered a “So do I, T, so do I.”

~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Epilogue

~*~*~*~*~*~*~

“Come on Space Monkey, its almost time!”

Daniel heard Jack’s yell from where he stood in his kitchen, making a pitcher of margaritas. The eagerness in his friend’s voice made him wince, as he wondered once more what had possessed him to invited his friends over to watch his episode of “Queer Eye for the Straight Guy.”

It had been shot a few months ago, and while the experience had been far from painless, the results more than made up for it.

“You do realize that Jack is going to have a field day with this for months to come, don’t you?”

He smiled at the petite woman working on a vegetable tray next to him. She made the entire experience worth it.

“I know, but he’s been giving me hell since they did the makeover, and you know I couldn’t not tell him when the show airs. He’s been bugging me about it for the past month.” He smiled as Janet burst into laughter, the sound still having the power to send a tingle down his spine.

“Yes, although I suspect that has something to do with the fact that they interviewed him for it.” Janet couldn’t help but smile at his wince, leaning up to plant a quick kiss on his lips. “Don’t worry, I’m sure what the rest of us said will more than make up for Jack.”

Daniel shuddered, not at all happy that the Queer Eye guys had interviewed his friends. He knew it was part of the process, but he hadn’t expected Jack to actually participate. Although part of him was rather curious to know what his best friend thought in regards to him. Then again, perhaps he was better off not knowing.

Janet could see he was nervous and it only endeared him to her more. The past few months had shown her a side of Daniel she’d suspected was there, but never expected to see. Her cheeks heated as she remembered the more passionate moments of the past few months. While she’d always been attracted to Daniel, the confidence that had seemed to encompass him since his ‘do over’ as Teal’c continued to call it, had added a depth to him she found more attractive by the day.

“Daniel, relax. It’s going to be fine. Besides,” she gave him a sexy smile as she slid up to him and pulled his head down until their lips were level with each other, “when you hear what I have to say, you won’t be thinking about what Jack said.” So saying, she pulled him down and kissed him with a passion that still surprised her.

Daniel returned the kiss, wrapping his arms tightly around her waist as he again marveled at the desire this small woman could stir in him. Not to mention the effect her kiss, plus her words, were having on his body. When she finally pulled back for air, he smiled down at her.

“So, want to give me a hint as to what I’ll be hearing?” Her laughter warmed his heart and he suddenly knew, from her smile, that he could handle even this as long as she was by his side.

“You’ll just have to wait, but not much longer!” With another quick kiss, she returned to putting the finishing touches on her vegetable tray.

Daniel sighed, forcing down his baser emotions, but determined to make her pay a little later. The thought brought a smile to his face as he finished pouring out the margaritas. Placing them on the tray along with Jack’s beer and Teal’c’s soda, he headed back to the living room, followed soon after by Janet.

“It’s about time! You don’t want to miss the beginning. The intro’s my favorite part.” Jack’s words drew raised eyebrows around the room, to which he only shrugged. “It’s the music, okay, the song is catchy.”

“Right,” Sam muttered under her breath, dodging the carrot Jack tossed her way. Picking it up from the floor with an evil smile, she launched the projectile back at him.

“You know, how old are you both?” Cassie’s amused voice came from the loveseat where she sat curled up under an afghan Daniel had picked up somewhere in Egypt during his earlier years.

Daniel smiled as Jack and Cassie bantered back and forth, with Sam chiming in every other sentence. Teal’c and Janet were watching with amused looks, refraining, he knew, from jumping in as well.

Despite his nerves, he suddenly found himself glad that his family was with him. The thought that he’d almost never known this, if he’d stayed ascended; well, he didn’t want to think about that now. Especially since, more importantly, he more than likely would be providing the base gossip for the next few months. Not that his ‘makeover’ hadn’t already fueled the flames.

“I do believe the program is starting.”

The group quieted at Teal’c’s words, settling into their seats. Janet had taken up residence on the loveseat next to her daughter, and Daniel smiled at the picture they made as he settled himself on the floor in front of them, his back resting against Janet’s legs. Turning his attention to the screen, he took a deep breath and prepared to enter the fire.

~*~*~*~*~*~

Fifteen minutes later, he found himself actually laughing along with his friends as he watched his confused looking image argue with Carson over the size of his pants.

“You know, Danny, I always said there were times you were too big for your britches-”

This time it was Daniel who threw a wadded up napkin ball at Jack. His friend looked wounded, but the gleam returned to his eyes as he shot the napkin back, cheering as it bounced off Daniel’s shoulder.

“Boys, I believe Janet and I are trying to watch Daniel argue about his butt. Let’s leave the ball tossing until after, okay?”

Sam’s reply drew groans, but focused the attention of the room back on the screen. Daniel felt better as he watched himself be led towards his apartment. He was actually looking forward to seeing how he reacted to his new environment.

However, right before he opened the door, he noticed they were preparing to cut to a commercial. His eyes widened as he saw Jack’s face appear, for the first time since the program began.

“I’ve known Daniel for more than eight years now and I can truly say he’s one of the most unique people I’ve ever met. A little overbearing at times, but it’s usually in defense of someone else. Still, he’s a bit of a packrat and completely obsessed with his ancient rocks, they’re all over the place. I’ve always said his apartment, if nothing else, could use a woman’s touch.”

“You did not!” Daniel knew his voice was higher than normal, but he was a little disturbed. “You never said my apartment could use a woman’s touch, I’d remember.”

Jack looked at him with a grin. “Yes, I did.”

Daniel frowned. “No, you didn’t.”

“Did.”

“Didn’t.”

“Did.”

“Didn’t.”

“Did.”

“Cruvis? What is that?” Sam’s voice startled both Jack and Daniel, who both turned to her with slight grins, obviously remembering the incident she was referring to.

“What did I miss?” Cassie was looking in confusion at the adults, who all, with the exception of Teal’c, were smiling broadly.

“Long story, Cass. From the day I knew a lot more than I do now.” Jack winked at Daniel who couldn’t help but smile, remembering Jack’s speech issues when he’d had the knowledge of the Ancients downloaded into his brain.

“You know, you guys are really strange.” Four of those in the room laughed at Cassie’s observation. “And that’s saying something coming from one of the two resident aliens in this room.” The young woman winked at Teal’c, who simply raised his eyebrows in reply.

“Okay, shush, it’s coming back on!” Janet’s voice brought Daniel’s attention back to the TV, where he was pleased to note he actually looked quite surprised upon walking back into his apartment.

“I can’t believe you let a bunch of gay men re-do your home, but you know something Space Monkey, I’m not complaining about what they did. Especially since it resulted in this sweet flat screen.”

Daniel sighed, thankful for the redeeming, at least in Jack’s eyes, flat screen. He felt Janet’s hand squeeze his shoulder and he reached up to cover it with his own, glad for her support.

“Is it wrong of me to find Kyan really hot?” Cassie’s comment had Jack and Daniel choking, but drew grins from Janet and Sam.

“You should see him in person, Cass. He might be gay, but I wouldn’t say no to him!”

Daniel’s eyes widened at Sam’s response, although he was more amused by the stunned look that Jack now wore as he gazed at his 2IC. He felt Janet nudge him gently, and a quick glance at her had him looking at Sam, who wore a Cheshire cat grin as she locked gazes with Jack.

“No offense, Carter, but I think Kyan is a bit out of your league.” The stunned look was quickly replaced by a smirk as he continued. “Now, however, if I was so inclined,” he stopped at the looks he was getting, “Not that I am, mind you, but if I was, I think I would be a bit more to Kyan’s taste.”

Daniel couldn’t help but choke on the sip of margarita he’d just taken, swallowing and laughing not conducive to being done together.

“No offense, Jack, but I think Carson would be more your league. He did mention to me that you had a cute tush.”

Daniel had to hold onto his sides, he was laughing so hard at Janet’s quip. He was only thankful he’d put the margarita down because he would most surely have dropped it.

Jack looked horrified, Sam and Cassie were laughing so hard they were almost crying, Janet was giggling behind him and Teal’c wore his usual stoic expression. Overall, it was a rather normal sight, although Daniel was sure that no one in the SGC would believe it if they saw it.

“All right, shhhh!” Cassie’s eager voice finally drew some kind of quiet as she gestured towards the screen. “This is where they try and teach Daniel how to cook, I want to see this.”

Daniel winced, remembering some of the things he and Ted had discussed during their cooking lesson. Deciding he was already a goner, he sank his head back against Janet’s legs and prepared for the worst.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~

“You really didn’t know what E-V-O-O was Daniel?” Janet’s teasing voice made him blush as he shrugged his shoulders.

“Come on, Daniel. I thought everybody and his mother knew about E-V-O-O.”

“You really called it Evoo? That’s so cute!”

Sam, Janet and Cassie were determined not to let this drop and Daniel was already wishing for a sudden Gou’ald attack. Hell, he’d even settle for a trip to another reality if it got him out of this teasing. Sighing, he decided to try and get himself out of this mess.

“You really expected me, the man whom you have to force to remember to eat at times, to know about Extra Virgin Olive Oil, Janet?”

“Actually, speaking of Extra Virgin-”

“Sir!”

“Colonel!”

Sam and Janet’s voices quickly cut off whatever Jack was about to say, much to Daniel’s relief. He shot a quick look at Cassie who was trying not to smile.

“Fine, be that way. You’re no fun.” Jack pretended to huff, but secretly Daniel knew he’d done just what he’d set out too, diverting the attention onto him. Not for the first time, Daniel thanked whomever had put Jack O’Neill in his path all those years ago.

“Oh look, there’s Aunt Sam!” At Cassie’s voice, Daniel focused again on the screen, noting his other teammate was about to get her turn to talk about him.

“Daniel’s always been somewhat of a favorite with the ladies. There’s just something so sweet and unassuming about the way he throws himself into his work. However, his hair tends to be a bit of an issue. It’s cute and all, but he’s always changing styles. Personally, I think the longer, shaggier look is the way to go, but I know others who like the shorter style. Still, you have to admit, he’s pretty darn cute no matter what the hairstyle.”

Daniel knew his cheeks must be bright red, not helped by the sound of Janet trying to hide her choked laughter from behind him. Struggling to find something to say, he was glad to find Jack beat him to it.

“I never realized you had such a thing for Danny’s hair. Not like you ever say anything about mine.” There was a tone to his voice that told Daniel his friend might be a bit upset at the idea that Sam was interested in his hair. Probably the whole ‘older, graying’ insecurity complex Jack tended to deny he had, but which Daniel knew full well he did.

“Come on, Jack, you’re military. Your hair has to stay the same, what there is of it. Daniel gets the freedom to experiment with his.” It was a reasonable excuse, although Daniel could tell it did not do much to pacify Jack, who immediately began to debate the merits of hairstyles with his 2IC.

Glad the focus had been taken off of him, he relaxed against Janet, who leaned over to whisper in his ear.

“Do you think they realize that this is their unique version of foreplay?”

Daniel was glad he’d left his margarita on the floor because he almost choked again at her words. When he finally found the air to speak, he leaned up to whisper back. “I think they passed foreplay years ago and they’ve now moved onto getting the entire sexual experience through these arguments.”

This time it was Janet who almost choked on her drink as she snorted with laughter.

“You know, I’m trying to watch something here.” Cassie looked at them in annoyance before motioning everyone back to the TV, where Daniel was now being observed by the Fab Five as he prepared for his evening. When they reached the ‘cooking’ part of the experience, even he winced as he burned his hand on the hot oil.

“You know, “EVOO” tends to get hot, even I know that, Daniel.” Jack’s voice, thankfully, held enough humor that Daniel didn’t take offense. He was just glad Janet had refrained from commenting.

“You know, if we really wanted to shock him we could mention the fact that you DO know just how hot EVOO can be when it’s used for… other things.”

He turned bright red as Janet whispered the words in his ear, remembering the exact occasion when he and Janet had discovered the myriad uses of EVOO for thing other than cooking. The memory brought a stupid smile to his face as he gently squeezed her ankle in reply.

“Why do I get the feeling we’re missing something over there?” Sam’s droll voice made Daniel aware that the attention was now on them. Hoping his blush was not extremely obvious, he shrugged.

“Nothing to see here, but I believe we’re about to see what the Fab Five thinks of all of us.” Janet’s even voice turned the attention back to the screen again and Daniel breathed a sigh of relief. The sigh quickly turned into a cough as he listened to the dialogue between the five men over Teal’c’s addressing them as “Extremely Happy Men.” Teal’c obviously, was confused.

“I do not see the problem. They are referred to as ‘gay’ which according to your dictionary means ‘happy.’ Why do they object to being referred to as ‘happy?’ And what is wrong with my hat? What is this word gauche?”

Jack sighed as he realized they’d never really covered “gay” with Teal’c like he’d promised. Opening his eyes, he looked over at his friend. “I promise, when this is over, I will explain to you what the problem is with referring to them as “extremely happy,” and as for the hat, well, it’s not the most stylish, but we can work on it, okay, T?”

“Indeed.” The Jaffa only nodded, although he looked like he wanted to say something else.

Sighing, Jack turned back to the TV, just in time to catch Thom’s referring to his ‘bias against homosexuals.’ Outraged, he began sputtering, only calmed by the feel of Sam’s hand on his arm.

“Relax, it’s just a TV show,” she whispered, amused at his reaction.

“Right, a TV show being seen by millions right about now,” he muttered under his breath. His thoughts were completely distracted by Ted’s comment about Sam not being the woman Daniel was trying to attract. Not to mention Sam’s reaction.

“What told him that Daniel wouldn’t be interested in me? I mean, they seem to think I’m an attractive woman, why wouldn’t they think that I would appeal to Daniel?”

There was an outrage in her voice that was rather amusing to Daniel, although Jack didn’t seem to find amusement in the words. A quick look at Janet told him that she was not exactly amused by Sam’s outburst either. Sensing things could get dicey, he tried to defuse the situation.

“You know, I think it was probably the fact that I mentioned Janet a few times to them, including the fact that she was a petite brunette.” He hoped it would be enough to diffuse the situation, punctuating it by smiling at Janet, who looked a little less annoyed.

“Humph,” Sam’s reply was lost as Cassie began shushing them again. “Look, mom’s coming and they’re going to talk about her!”

Daniel perked up as he felt Janet tense a bit. He was anxious to see what their first impression of Janet was going to be. He wasn’t disappointed to hear them absolutely gushing over the woman he was in love with. Turning, he looked up to gauge her reaction, noting she wore a becoming flush on her cheeks and looked a little embarrassed.

“Wow, I didn’t realize I was so attractive to gay men.” The wonder in Janet’s voice irked Daniel a bit, although he wasn’t sure why. Still, it didn’t stop him from tugging on her ankle, forcing her to lean over into his personal space.

Uncaring that most of their friends were watching, he leaned up and captured her lips in a heated kiss that drew groans and whistles from their friends. When they finally pulled apart, he winked at Janet. “That’s just to remind you that this extremely straight guy finds you pretty attractive as well.”

Jack’s laughter rang through the living room, and Daniel was happy to note even Teal’c looked slightly less stoic than normal. Feeling happier, he leaned back against Janet’s legs, realizing as the show went to break that it was time for her testimonial. Perking up again, he listened to what she had to say, his mind still turning over the words she’d whispered to him earlier.

“I know a side of Daniel Jackson that most probably don’t, considering I am his doctor and have treated him for more injuries than I care to count. However, while I’m not adverse to a little change with his hair, overall, I think he’s quite attractive and stylish the way he is, and trust me, I’ve seen enough of the various parts of him to know that he’s not lacking in anything majorly important.”

Daniel wasn’t sure what to say, considering his mind was still caught on her suggestive words, cloaked in the perfectly normal voice she’d delivered them in. They stirred a heat low in his body that he knew would only be satisfied by overdosing on Janet. Something that was not exactly an immediate possibility, much to his dismay.

“Well, well, well. Doc, there something you want to share with the group since you just shared that all with the viewing public?” Jack’s amused voice drew light laughter from Janet, Daniel was happy to note, considering he was still trying to control his raging hormones.

“Forget the group, Jan, I want details.” The delighted expression on Sam’s face drew a frown from Jack and an embarrassed blush from Daniel.

Daniel smiled as Janet leaned over to place a kiss on the top of his head. “Sorry, that’s confidential doctor/patient information, Sam.”

Daniel smiled smugly.

“Yes, but you’re not his doctor, officially, anymore, since you two started dating.” Sam’s triumphant reply, Daniel was happy to note, drew only amused laughter from Janet.

“Sorry, I’m not talking.” Daniel smiled as she leaned down and kissed him. “Although I suspect we’ll be chatting a little later tonight.” The words were whispered in his ear, bringing another blush to his cheeks and broadening his smile. Turning back to the TV, he happily settled in to watch the rest of the show.

~*~*~*~*~*~

Five minutes later, SG-1, Cassie and Janet were all avidly discussing the show, offering their own thoughts on Daniel’s transformation. The subject of discussion himself was happily watching instead of participating however. It was actually quite interesting to watch his friends debate his lifestyle and his ‘makeover.’ Overall, it hadn’t been as bad as he’d thought and truth be told, he was glad that they’d watched it with him.

Not to mention he had a little unfinished business he intended to take care of with Janet when they all cleared out. Which, if he had anything to say about it, would be soon.

“Okay, on that note, it’s 10pm and I believe we’re all scheduled to be back on base bright and early tomorrow.” He knew it was pretty obvious what he was doing, especially when Jack rolled his eyes at him.

“Fine, I can take a hint. Carter, Teal’c, I think that’s our cue to leave.” Daniel smiled as his friend winked at him. “You need a ride Cass, I assume Janet’s going to stay and help Daniel clean up?”

Janet smiled and nodded while her daughter rolled her eyes. “Thanks, it’s better than being around these two for too long.” With a smile to show she really didn’t mean her words, she kissed her on the cheek before going over to hug Daniel.

“You did good, nothing to worry about.” She kissed his cheek before turning and following the others out the door.

When the group finally cleared out, the door locked behind them, Daniel breathed a sigh of relief. Turning around, he smiled as he noticed Janet busy cleaning up the living room. Walking over, he slid his arms around her waist, pulling her around until she was wrapped comfortably in his arms.

Janet smiled up at him, wrapping her arms around his neck. “Was there something on your mind Dr. Jackson?”

Daniel smiled as he realized that for the first time in a long time, his life was just about perfect.

“Only you, and just exactly which of my body parts you find so non-lacking.”

Her brilliant smile made his heart swell as she leaned up and proceeded to kiss him senseless.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~

The End

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