A Merry Bloody Christmas
by Bryn
EMAIL:bambam126@hotmail.com
RATING: PG
CATEGORY: D/J romance, response to Christmas Challenge, humor hopefully
SPOILERS: i don't think so...
SEASON/SEQUEL: season 4 sounds good
SUMMARY: What would Christmas be without an huge fight, Teal'c singing and
mistletoe?
DISCLAIMER: All publicly recognisable characters and places
are the property of MGM, World Gekko Corp and Double Secret
Productions. This piece of fan fiction was created for
entertainment not monetary purposes and no infringement on
copyrights or trademarks was intended. Previously
unrecognised characters and places, and this story, are
copyrighted to the author. Any similarity to real persons,
living or dead, is coincidental and not intended by the
author.
AUTHOR'S NOTES: as always thanks to the best beta ever: kat!
this one is dedicated to Lyn B :)
i would like to stress yet again how much feedback DOES NOT SUCK!!! :)
2000 Christmas Challenge
Your story must include the following:
1. Mistletoe
2. a Dan&Jan kiss
3. A symbol of christmas: ie, an angel, santa claus, reindeer, a
star, a snowman, etc.
4. someone from the SGC seranading Dan&Jan with a christmas carol
(bonus points if it's someone from SG1).
Janet could feel herself getting mad. Normally she wasn’t a short-tempered
person, so the fact that she was upset baffled her. Of course, her
confusion at her anger just made her angrier, which lead to a vicious cycle
until she was thoroughly pissed. She was only certain of one thing: the
object of her anger was Daniel.
He had just left after completing his post-mission physical and had barely
said a word to her. Janet had tried making small talk by asking him if he
had any plans for Christmas, but he’d just mumbled an incoherent response
and left in a hurry as soon as he could. So why was Janet standing there,
staring after him, suddenly very hurt and offended? She couldn’t for the
life of her understand. Why should she care, it’s just Daniel, she reminded
herself.
She held her temper mostly in check for the rest of the day, only snapping
at the occasion nurse, until Daniel came back into the infirmary. She saw
him and couldn’t help but scowl.
“Hey Janet, can you help me run a few scans on this artifact we brought back
from P4X-987?” Daniel said, still intently studying the artifact in his
hands.
“Oh sure, what else am I good for?” Janet rolled her eyes. “Evidently I
have no other use!” she said and stocked off toward one of the labs, leaving
Daniel to follow along behind her, very confused.
“Um… ok,” he said with a furrowed brow.
Setting the artifact in the center of one of the scans, Daniel went over to
the computer. Janet went to another and seethed. Daniel didn’t notice.
“I’m not noticing anything peculiar,” Daniel said.
“Not that you would,” Janet mumbled.
“Excuse me?”
“Daniel, you are the least observant man I’ve ever met!” Janet shot back.
She turned to face him, just so it would be easier to yell at him.
“What’s that suppose to mean?” Daniel asked, taken slightly aback. He too
turned to face Janet, for the moment forgetting about the artifact.
“I don’t know, Daniel, why don’t you tell me?” Janet snapped.
“Ok, so you’re mad at me, I get that. *Why* are you mad at me? I’ve barely
spoken to you today, what could I have done to piss you off like this?”
“Exactly, Daniel! You’ve barely spoken to me today.”
“So?”
“Did it ever occur to you that maybe I wanted to be spoken to?”
“Do you?”
“I don’t know!”
“That’s an answer?”
“You’re impossible!”
“I’m impossible? You can’t even answer any of my questions!”
“Maybe you should answer some of them on your own! Why do I have to have
all the answers? You’re a smart man, try using some of that intellect for
something useful!”
“See, there you go again! You’re not answering my questions, just confusing
the hell out of me!” Daniel threw up his hands in disgust.
“What, now you’re mad at me?”
“It’s kind of hard not to be when you’re yelling at me!”
“So this is all my fault?”
“I dare you to tell me how it’s mine! You know, Janet, you really know how
to make the holidays a great time of year!” Daniel snapped at her with more
than a little sarcasm in his voice.
Janet’s eyes narrowed in anger and she spun on her heels, storming out of
the room. “And a merry bloody Christmas to you too!” she yelled over her
shoulder on the way out.
Christmas Eve turned out to be white and beautiful. Sam, being in a very
festive mood this year, decided to have a Christmas party at her house for
all of her close friends. It was supposed to be perfect. Maybe I shouldn’t
have invited Daniel and Janet then, she thought looking around the small
living room of her apartment. The party mainly consisted of SG-1, Janet,
Cassie, General Hammond, Simmons, Siler, Davis, and several other SGC staff
members, but it was mainly the archeologist and the doctor who were causing
the problems. This, of course, caused great confusion among the other
guests because they were usually the peacekeepers of the group, not the ones
who were about to get threatened with expulsion from the party.
“So, any idea what’s up with them?” Jack asked Sam, indicating Daniel and
Janet, who were at the moment shooting very nasty glares at one another.
“Not a clue,” Sam replied with a sigh. “They’ve either completely ignored
or glared at each other all night.”
“They’ve been like that all day too,” Cassie added as she walked up. “All I
know is Janet is supremely pissed at Daniel about something and she won’t
tell me why. She came home from work in a bad mood yesterday, so I’m
guessing that’s when it happened.”
“So that’s why Daniel wasn’t very talkative about his rocks today. And I
just thought it was my good luck.” Jack shrugged. “Uh oh, this could be
interesting.”
Somehow both Daniel and Janet had ended up at the refreshment table at the
same time, with poor Graham stuck in between them. They both noticed each
other immediately but were too stubborn to move and still way too mad to be
civil to each other.
"Graham will you please ask Dr. Fraiser to move so that I can reach the
dip?" Daniel said to Simmons while intensely not looking at Janet.
"Um..." Graham glanced nervously at Daniel, then turned to Janet, but at her
deathly stare seemed to lose all train of thought.
"Graham, you may inform Dr. Jackson that I have no intention of moving at
this time, especially since he only wants the dip because I'm standing in
front of it," Janet said coldly.
"And they call *me* the childish one..." mumbled Jack, from his vantage
point across the room where he still stood with Sam and Cassie.
Graham had turned to Daniel and tried unsurely to deliver his message to his
apparently insane co-workers. "Um..."
"You may inform *her*, Graham, that I do indeed want dip," Daniel
interrupted him, glaring at Janet this time.
This time Graham didn't even bother playing along since it was not only
utterly pointless, but he also kept getting cut off. Instead he just stood
there, helplessly looking back and forth between the two doctors.
"Since when has *he* liked dip?" Janet asked in the direction of Graham,
while glaring back at Daniel.
"I have always been fond of dip, as a matter of fact, and I would very
much-” Daniel was interrupted as he and Janet were abruptly grabbed by their
arms by a large and very annoyed Jaffa. "Teal'c? What are you doing?"
Daniel protested as they were dragged from the refreshment table towards
Sam's bedroom.
"You are both behaving like children. Therefore I am treating you as I
would my son, if he were misbehaving," Teal'c replied, shoving his friends
into the bedroom. "Until your behavior improves, you are in time out."
Both Daniel and Janet begrudgingly sat down on the bed when they realized
that the large warrior wasn't about to budge from the doorway. They both
sat at separate ends though, and refused to so much as look at each other.
Curious about what was going on, Sam, Jack and Cassie had all followed
Teal'c to the bedroom and were now standing behind him, looking very amused.
"I would suggest you take this time to resolve your differences so that you
may be released,” Teal’c advised his captives.
"Not likely Teal'c, they're both far too stubborn for that," Jack chuckled,
only to be shot a death stare by Janet.
"I do not understand their actions, O'Neill," Teal'c said. "On Chulak when
a man and woman have feelings for one another they express them, they do not
bicker and fight like children."
Everyone in the room turned and stared at Teal'c, trying for a moment to
figure out if he just said what they thought he said.
"Teal'c I don't think they're fighting because they have feelings for one
another," Sam said, the first to recover.
"Of course they are. Why else would Dr. Fraiser be so upset that Daniel
Jackson had barely regarded her while he was in the infirmary? Likewise,
why else would Daniel Jackson be so upset that Dr. Fraiser was angry with
him?" Teal'c said, raising a ‘brow as if daring anyone to disagree with
him.
Cassie was the first to smile. "I think he's right," she said firmly. Janet
stared at her, dumbfounded. Cassie just smiled back. "Oh come on, grow up!
So what if you do like him? It wouldn't be the worst thing in the world,
Daniel's a great guy!"
Sam and Jack couldn't help but laugh and agree to Cassie's assessment of the
situation. Jack, being the most devious of the group, was the next to say
what was on everyone's minds. "So what do we do to get these two love birds
together?"
"Perhaps I should serenade them with a Christmas song. Cassandra has
thought me one of her favorites," Teal'c suggested and before anyone could
protest (which they tried to, loudly) he began singing "Jingle Bells"
extremely off-key.
"Surprisingly enough, I think I have a better idea," Sam smiled.
"What?" Jack asked as he and Cassie looked at her, both of them covering
their ears as Teal'c started in on the chorus.
Sam simply slipped from the room and returned a moment later with small
branch.
"What is the purpose of that, Samantha Carter?" Teal'c asked, his curiosity
overcoming his desire to sing enough that he had thankfully stopped.
"This is mistletoe, Teal'c," Sam grinned. "It is an earth tradition that
when two people pass under a sprig of mistletoe that they must kiss."
Ushering everyone but the still-captive Daniel and Janet out of the room,
Sam pinned the mistletoe in the doorway. "Now, if they want to come out,
they have to kiss."
The others re-joined the party in the main room, confident that they would
see their friends leave the room if they attempted it, but allowing them
enough privacy to work through their problems as they pleased.
Janet slumped back on the bed with a great sigh. "Why do we have to have
such nosy, evil friends?"
"Oh, so you're talking to me now?" Daniel asked.
"You started it."
"Um... no, I believe you caused this whole problem."
"That's nice, Daniel, just blame me for everything. Well fine then, I can
stay in here all night. Sam'll want to go to bed eventually, she'll have to
let us out then."
Daniel rolled his eyes. "At least I didn't get pissed off because you
didn't say hi to me one day!"
Janet sat up and turned to Daniel. "First of all, I'm a decent human being.
Unlike others *I* say hi to people and have conversations with my friends.
Second off, that's *not* why I'm mad!"
"Oh really?" Daniel shifted on the bed so he too was facing Janet. Only
the corner of the bed separated them. "Then why are you mad at me?"
"I... I don't know! But that's sure not the reason! While we're on the
topic though, why are you so mad?"
"You're pissed off at me for no reason!"
"So? Why do you care if I'm mad at you? What difference does it make to
you?"
Daniel opened his mouth to say something, but quickly realized he had
nothing to say. He closed his mouth again and looked straight into Janet's
eyes. After a few calming breathes and a bit of soul searching, he finally
said softly: "Because Teal'c was right."
Janet's first reaction was shock. She just stared at him. Then quietly she
admitted: "So was Cassie." She looked down at her hands.
They were both quiet for a minute. Neither of them knew what to say. So
they sat there, in silence, staring at everything in the room except each
other. Suddenly a small stuffed angel came flying through the air, bounced
off the top of Janet’s head, and landed in her lap. Looking up they saw
Cassie standing in the doorway, the picture of innocence.
“What’s this?” Janet asked her adopted daughter suspiciously.
“It’s an angel. Sam says it’s a symbol of Christmas,” Cassie smiled sweetly
in reply.
“I know it’s an angel! Why did you feel the need to throw it at me?”
“Just a little reminder that there is a very lovely Christmas party out here
if you two decide to grow up anytime soon,” Cassie smiled again then
disappeared from sight.
Janet rolled her eyes. Cassie was about as angelic as Jack. Glancing over
at Daniel, she saw him chuckling softly to himself, but still not looking at
her. So picking up the small stuffed angel in her lap, she chucked it at
his head. It was only fair if she got hit in the head, that so should he.
“Hey, what was that for?” Daniel asked.
“I wanted your attention.” Janet smiled.
Daniel smiled back. But instead of answering right away, he grabbed Janet’s
hand and pulled her off the bed, towards the doorway with him. Once there,
he faced her and gently cupped her face in his hands. After a second of
staring into her eyes he leaned down and softly brushed her lips with his.
Pulling back slightly so that they were only a few millimeters apart, he
whispered: “You have my attention. Fully, undivided, and constantly. I
promise.”
Janet couldn’t stop smiling enough to form any decent words, so instead she
just reached her arms up around Daniel’s neck and pulled him closer for a
long, deep kiss. They didn’t even notice the shouts and wolf whistles
coming from the other room.
Copyright Bryn 2001
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